It’s my duty to discuss the guy you have the great second date with and never hear from. Harsh as it may sound, I sometimes like to pretend he died for the couple of weeks he doesn’t call because, strangely, it feels better for my ego-driven mind to assume he no longer exists as opposed to facing the possible truth that he is no longer interested. When you meet and subsequently go out with someone, it is natural for you to feel excited about them and then they go and disappoint you by “forgetting” to call. The fact is, however, that when you really like someone, they’re always on your mind. Therefore, the “he probably forgot to call me” excuse is really code for “he probably hasn’t thought about me.” Then there is always the guy who is too busy to call. You say that he’s been out of town a lot, or all of a sudden, right after your last date, he got 50 new clients at work (how convenient), or he had to put on a puppet show or a myriad of other barriers kept him from making a five minute phone call that he knew would put your mind at ease.
The “busy argument,” as I like to refer to it, has become far more difficult to believe when the context of this increasingly technological age is taken into account. With the introduction of cellular telephones that allow you to browse the web and access email, not to mention the popularity of text messaging, it’s difficult not to keep in contact with someone. I don’t care if you are so busy you have to send me a text message when you’re taking your bathroom break, just let me know I haven’t slipped your mind.
The way I see it, it really is a big deal if someone tells you they are going to call you, and they don’t. It becomes even more critical at the beginning stages of a relationship when you consider the fact that this is the time expectations are being set. If someone sets expectations for you, in this case the expectation being a phone call, and they don’t come through for the little things, it is fair to assume that they will ultimately do the same for big things. This behavior is detrimental to the notion of trust and I have come to realize early on if the guy I’m dating is ok with disappointing me. In conclusion I would like to advise that you stop making excuses for anyone you date and date someone who is at least as good as their word, a person who actually does what they say they are going to do.
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